Sleepless Nights

Below is an article I was recently asked to write for the Autism Society of Collin County's newsletter. I guess word of Gabe's "sleepless nights" has gotten around. :)

My son, Gabriel, has had difficulty sleeping since birth – three years ago. I was home on maternity leave when CNN coincidentally ran a series on newborns. When they reported that newborns typically sleep 16 hours or more a day, I was shocked! Gabe was barely sleeping half that including day and night.

As most babies grow and begin to sleep longer, it seemed that Gabe was sleeping less! Was this even possible? There were many days that I arrived to work with less than three hours sleep. Needless to say, I would grow a bit agitated when other mothers complained of their own children’s terrible sleep habits, only to find out that meant that little “Sam” had not gone to bed until 10:00 PM or that little “Jessica” woke up at 2:00 AM and was awake for twenty minutes. If I even had the energy to share my sleepless stories, the other moms would appear shocked and probably thought I was greatly exaggerating. It was not uncommon for Gabe to fall asleep after 11:00 PM only to wake up at 2:00 AM and stay awake for hours.

When Gabe turned two, we had a variety of concerns, other than Gabe’s lack of sleep, and after months of tests and evaluations, he was diagnosed with Autism. Upon learning of Gabe’s special needs, I quit my job to be home with him each day. Although I loved my job, I was relieved. I was growing very uncertain as to how I was going to continue working while suffering from severe sleep deprivation.

Of course, my husband and I tried everything to help Gabe sleep! We followed a sensory diet, strictly enforced the Gluten Free/Casein Free diet for many months, used a weighted blanket, followed a bedtime routine, gave Gabe enzymes and supplements, reduced the amount of sugar and dyes that he was allowed to have, gave Melatonin, and eventually tried more serious medication under the recommendation of his developmental pediatrician. After following many suggestions, Gabe still had a very challenging time falling and staying asleep.

I now sleep with Gabe in an effort to get much-needed sleep. It’s not uncommon for Gabe to wake around 2:00 A.M. and begin laughing and babbling loudly. He may stay in his bed for awhile, rolling around laughing, before popping up wild-eyed and wide awake. There are some nights where Gabe spends hours running around his room, while loudly shrieking. He may stop occasionally to play with his cars or trains, but then quickly returns to running laps. Gabe will eventually attempt to pull me out of bed to go toward the kitchen. I groggily force myself out of bed and practically sleepwalk to the kitchen where a battle usually ensues over what he can have for a snack. Gabe obsesses over various food items which can turn into a battle of wills at 3:00 AM. Sometimes I am able to get Gabe back to sleep by 5:00 AM or so and sometimes he is up for the day. If he falls asleep, it is often very difficult to wake him up for school only a short time later. Gabe has missed days of school when, after such an exhausting night, it was just too painful for either of us to wake up in time.

Following our most recent trip to the neurologist, we began giving both Melatonin and Benadryl every night simultaneously. Since beginning this new “cocktail,” we have had much better success at both getting Gabe to sleep at a decent time and keeping him asleep. With the exception of the occasional 4AM start to his day, Gabe has been able to sleep through the night for several weeks now. It’s amazing how much difference sleep can make. For the first time in a long time, I don’t constantly feel like a zombie. I have enough energy and focus to hold a conversation. However, like everything else that we experience in this journey on the Autism spectrum, we can not predict what tomorrow might bring. For now, we are enjoying our reprieve from sleepless nights.